Falling...Fall On?

I'll admit it- sometimes, I have some trust issues.

Trust is a scary thing.

People tell you they're going to do something.

They either do it, or they don't.

And suddenly, the control, and the answer is taken out of your own hand, and put into the hands of someone else.

Someone you may not know.

Someone you may not like.

Someone you may not understand.

I can link these trust issues back to one specific event in my life.

Camp Misty Mountain.

1999.

The trust fall.

Now, for those of you individuals lucky enough to have never experienced this glorious outdoor activity, let me break it down for you.

You get up on a platform, usually 4 to 5 feet of of the ground.

You put your heels on the edge of that platform.

You cross your arms across your chest.

You close your eyes, take a deep breath, and call out those fateful words

"Falling!"

And you wait, until you hear,

"Fall on!"

And then, with all of the trust and courage you can muster up, you fall backwards, off of the platform, into the arms of your team waiting with strategically placed arms, standing below you.

Now, imagine this scenario, with nine year old me, weighing 180 pounds, standing up on that platform.

Waiting to fall into the 90 pound arms of my peers below.

You can understand why the trust wasn't exactly there, can't you?

You can understand why I started to cry, can't you?

You can understand why I had to climb down from the platform with my head hanging in shame, can't you?

Of course you can. Every sane and rational person would.

I understood that I was overweight.

I understood that most of my fellow campers could barely lift  a log, let alone a girl double their size.

I understood that the likelihood of me, falling through their arms was extremely probable.

So, I did what I understood.

I got off of the platform.

I still do that now sometimes, when it comes to my relationship with God.

I try to make some sort of semblance of understanding with the situations in my own life.

I try to rely on the knowledge that I have gathered.

I try to make sense of this crazy world myself.

But then, I am truly reminded about what a trustworthy God we serve.

In Proverbs 3, it tells us

Trust in the Lord with all your heart
    and lean not on your own understanding;
⁶ in all your ways submit to him,
    and he will make your paths straight.

And of course, that makes sense. 

If we rely on God, he'll help us through. 

If we trust in Him, our path will be straight.

But then, Solomon ( the writer of Proverbs) really blows God's credentials out of the water.

By wisdom the Lord laid the earth’s foundations,
    by understanding he set the heavens in place;

I need to trust in the Lord's wisdom in my job search, because it is the same wisdom that created the world.

That shaped the mountains.

That poured the oceans.

I need to lean on God's understanding for His plan in my life, because it is the same understanding that set the heavens in place.

That placed the North Star.

That designed Orion's belt.

This God of great wisdom and understanding is the same God that is offering to take hold of my life, take a weight off my shoulders, and direct my path in the best way possible.

And if that isn't worth taking a trust fall for, I'm not sure what is.